


Pain

by TwilightRose



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Farmer America?, I was just thinking about how much pain England could stand and then this happened, M/M, Special side character mentioned ;), Still not that good though, USUK - Freeform, Wow.... this is one of my better ones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-06
Updated: 2016-09-28
Packaged: 2018-07-21 23:19:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7409143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwilightRose/pseuds/TwilightRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Arthur had a surprisingly large pain tolerance. Which was a good thing, but not really helpful right now. Maybe this cheerful farmer could help him out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For some reason I was thinking about how much pain Arthur could stand and then this happened....

Arthur had a surprisingly large pain tolerance. His brothers had made sure of that with all their bullying when he was a child (the worst time was when they pushed him into a river-he almost drowned getting out). But his brothers weren’t here now. It had been almost five years since he had seen any of his siblings. The older ones had all moved out and gotten jobs and settled down to make big families. Mum was real proud of them. She always made sure to mention that back in the days Arthur had happened to visit with a gleam in her eye. As for Peter, Arthur had stopped visiting that house when Mum’s nagging to get a nice girl and settle down with her and her constant attempts at matchmaking had gotten to be too much for him. She already knew he didn’t swing that way anyway, but still continued to make plans for him. But he called every month to make sure Peter was doing alright and they had made plans to have him move in with Arthur as soon as he was of legal age. 

It wasn’t that he  _ hated _ his mother. It was just that for years she had been content to ignore him and let him fend for himself and Peter while she doted on the eldest of her children, Allistor. And then Arthur had grown up and gotten a successful job that payed a lot of money and suddenly Allistor was flung away and Arthur was the new favorite child. It was as if she expected him to forget all the isolation and “I’m sure he didn’t  _ mean _ to push you into the river Arthur. Besides, you’re fine.”

Arthur supposed he had a high tolerance for emotional pain too. 

However, his mother wasn’t here today either. 

No, today he was all by himself in the middle of bloody nowhere because he had decided to take a roadtrip across America (a country he didn’t even  _ live _ in for god’s sake- what had he been thinking?!) and forgotten to fill the car’s gas tank at his last stop. 

And now, he was stuck sitting near the front of his car, because he had twisted his ankle when he tripped on one of the  _ bloody _ cracks on the side of the road as he had gotten out. And the long stretch of road was completely empty- no one to be seen for miles as it was the middle of the night and no one in their right mind would actually be caught dead unless they were planning through the night  _ and _ day (like he had). 

Arthur guessed he should calm down and try to get back inside his car. 

So he got up, cursing when he automatically tried to put pressure on his right leg out of habit (how was he going to drive  _ now?! _ ), and hobbled his way back the driver’s seat, awkwardly opening the door and maneuvering so that he could sit down without any pain in the process. 

Finally seated, he looked at his surroundings with despair. On one side was a large field of grain or something that seemed to stretch out infinitely. The same side greeted him on the other side of the road. Arthur was sure that he was somewhere in the middle of Idaho, but he had no idea where. He had been lost for  _ ages _ before his car finally gave out. 

Come to think of it, Arthur could remember a situation similar to this. He had been in London, and he was still in college. He and some friends had gone out drinking and for some reason, his drunk self had decided to walk all the way to his mother’s house. Her house wasn’t  _ anywhere _ close to London and so he had woken up somewhere in the middle of the city with a huge hangover, a dead phone, and no money to use any of the phone booths. He had somehow gotten back to his hotel with the help of some kind strangers (which were a rare sight in London even then, everyone was so  _ busy _ with their own lives). 

If that situation had ended well, why not this one? Arthur supposed that he should wait until morning and then try to ask for help. In the meanwhile, he was going to get some sleep. He hadn’t slept properly in a while as he had started driving as soon as his plane landed. During the plane ride from England to America, he had been sitting next to an albino man that just  _ wouldn’t _ stop talking for a minute about how awesome he was and all the  _ great _ things he had accomplished in his life. 

It had been a long day (two days actually, if you count the plane ride). 

Arthur reclined the seat he was sitting in so that he could be more comfortable. He shivered when he heard a howl in the distance. He hoped a car passed by quickly when he woke up. 

It was hard to relax in such unfamiliar surroundings though. He was still in an uncomfortable position on his back because he couldn’t move without the threat of hurting his ankle even more. As he shifted in place, he caught a glimpse of a sight that reminded him why he had wanted to go on such a long trip in the first place. 

Through the windows, thousands of stars twinkled in the dark sky and the moon’s pale light fell on his face and lit up the inside of the car. 

Arthur fell asleep staring at this gorgeous night sky. He had a smile on his face.

XOXOXOXOXOX

“Hey! Are you awake? Dude get up!”

A loud tapping on the side of the car and an obnoxiously cheerful voice woke a tired Arthur from his rest. He glared at the headache inducing sunlight pouring through the window (he could already feel the beginnings of one threatening to erupt behind his temple) before a shadow blocked it by leaning through the open back passenger door. 

“I’m sorry, but you left the doors unlocked. Have you been out here all night?”

The owner of the voice seemed to have been clued in to Arthur’s headache for his voice had gotten softer, gaining a feather like quality. 

“Ah, yeah. I have.” Arthur placed a hand on his forehead as he struggled to get up and was immediately reminded of his ankle. He let out a soft grunt of pain and fell down on his back once again. 

“Oh. Are you hurt?” The voice started to pick up again, but Arthur couldn’t make out the face of the person in the bright light surrounding it. From what he could tell from looking at his built body and and the voice, he seemed to be a young man. 

“I twisted my ankle during the night. I couldn’t see where I was going.”

The man hissed and moved to the front door to open it. “Okay. I’m going to get you out.”

“I can do it by myself! I don’t need help.” Arthur struggle to get up quickly. It was embarrassing enough that he had gotten stuck here in the first place. 

The man chuckled and helped an uncooperating Arthur sit up. “I’m sure you can. I’m Alfred by the way.”

“Arthur.” Arthur grumbled out as he turned so that he was sitting sideways on the seat, his legs outside. The man kneeled down and now Arthur could finally see his face. Blonde hair, with strand defiantly sticking up, framed a youthful face. Sky blue eyes twinkled with merriment and full lips turned upward in a shy smile. Arthur was glad he was able to look away from the mesmerizing sight. He could feel his face warm up.

“Hi Arthur.”

“Hello.” Arthur hoped his blush wasn’t too noticeable. He looked back at Alfred when he started to move. Alfred got up and offered his hand to Arthur.

“Come on, my car’s over there. I’ll take you to my house and wrap that ankle.” Alfred’s voice turned playful. “I would carry you, but I don’t think you’d like that.”

Arthur took the hand, his blush getting worse as he spluttered in outrage. Alfred laughed as he helped Arthur stumble to his car. It was a truck with things heaped on the back. When they made it to the truck, Alfred ended up picking Arthur anyway to get him onto the seat. Arthur glared at Alfred when he was put down, but he just laughed and walked around the car to get into the driver’s seat. It was just a mile to Alfred’s house. Alfred chattered the whole way there and didn’t seem to need any input from Arthur except a hum of acknowledgement here or there. They turned on a road that was surrounded by a field. 

“We’re here! This is my farm.” Alfred’s proud voice caused Arthur to smile. 

“It’s nice.” And it was. The sky was calm and filled with fluffy clouds and a small breeze brushed through the fields, making the scene picturesque. A house came into view. It was a two story building with new looking white paint. “Do you live here alone?”

“Yeah.” Alfred’s voice turned sad as he parked the car. “I had a mom and brother but they left when I was ten. Never came back. My dad used to live here with me but he died a year ago.”

“Oh.’’ Arthur stared at Alfred, feeling horrible for bringing that up. 

“But it’s fine!” Alfred seemed to sense Arthur’s feelings and brightened up. “I like living here.”

“Yeah.” Arthur didn’t understand how someone like Alfred could be alone. Sure they had known each other for about an hour, but Arthur could see Alfred was a bright, friendly person.

He watched Alfred get out of the car and come back to his side of the vehicle. He opened the door and helped Arthur get down and into the house. They got into the house and Arthur sat down on a worn looking couch. He looked around. The house was a bit on the messy side with knick knacks scattered around the whole place, but it gave off a welcoming feel. 

“Here you go.” Alfred had left to the kitchen to get some food when Arthur had mentioned that he hadn’t had any dinner. Arthur stared at the food on the plate hungrily. There was bacon on the side and a stack of pancakes covered in maple syrup. He took the plate from Alfred and balanced it on his lap before taking the fork and knife from Alfred’s other hand and digging in. Alfred sat in the couch across from him and looked at him happily. “Wow, you  _ were _ really hungry.” 

“Mmmhmm.” Arthur made sure he wasn’t eating like an animal in front of his host, but still kept eating as fast as possible. 

“I’m glad someone likes my cooking. I haven’t had people over in a long time.” Arthur stopped at this and looked at Alfred. He looked genuinely happy to have Arthur here, which made Arthur sad that he had been alone for a long time before this. Even Arthur himself had some friends, even though he knew that he wasn’t the best person to hang out with. To see someone the total opposite of him- someone who would make friends easily- so alone…. It made Arthur feel depressed.

Arthur looked at Alfred seriously and said, “It’s really good,” before turning back to his meal. 

Soon, Arthur was finished eating and all that was on his mind was some rest. He had only slept for a few hours in the car. Alfred saw this and offered him one of the spare rooms to sleep in. 

“But I’ve already taken enough advantage of you!” Arthur protested to an unyielding Alfred.

“It’s fine. I like having someone over.” Alfred said, making Arthur feel guilty enough that he agreed. 

The room he was taken to was on the second floor and had a colored a soft sunset orange and was bare except for a soft looking bed, a closet, and two dressers on each side of the bed. There was a window overlooking the farm.

The bed looked like heaven for Arthur. Unluckily, Alfred made him sit down and let him treat his foot before he let him fall asleep. Thankfully, Alfred finished quickly and let him fall backwards soon enough. As soon as Arthur layed down on those smooth sheets and fluffy pillow, he fell asleep.

By the time he woke up, the sun was going down. Arthur smiled at the plate of food left on the right dresser with a note next to it that said, “I made this for you to eat when you wake up. By the way, I also got your car towed to the house and put your suitcases in the room. Come down when you’re done.”

Sure enough, his bags were sitting next to the door. Arthur turned back to the food and picked it up. The food was still warm so Alfred must have left it not long ago. When he finished, he wandered (hopping most of the way) down the stairs and eventually found Alfred on the porch staring at the sunset. He stopped next to him and maneuvered into one of the chairs. 

“It’s pretty ain’t it?” Alfred said without looking away. 

Arthur frowned, his love for grammar coming out. “It’s  _ isn’t _ not ain’t but yes. It is very pretty.”

Alfred chuckled at the correction but didn’t say anything. Both of them stared at the beautiful hues of red and orange the sun cast on the sky. Arthur was in deep thought. He couldn’t stay with Alfred forever. He should find a way to get to a bus and find his way back to New York, which was where his plane had landed. He still had almost all his vacation left, and he could spend it comfortably in his own home.

Arthur glanced at Alfred, steeling himself to speak. “I think that I should leave soon. I don’t want to intrude anymore than I already have.”

Alfred gazed at Arthur in surprised horror when he heard his words and got up from his seat. “You don’t have to! You can stay as long as you want! You’re not intruding at all!”

Arthur was taken aback by how vehemently Alfred protested. He had thought Alfred would be glad to get rid of him. He knew his friends would have been. “But…”

Alfred stared at him seriously. “Is it that you have some important meeting or something?”

“Ah no.” Arthur blushed. “I was just taking a trip that’s all. I’m on vacation.”

Alfred nodded as if he had decided something. “Then you don’t have to go anywhere. You don’t have anything important to go to and you’re looking for someplace to relax. Besides you’re hurt! And….” Alfred stared at the ground with a blush. “I’d really like the company. I know we’ve only known each other for a day- and not even that, but I can see that you’re a nice person… And it’s been so long since anyone’s been here. I only see people when I go to the town or a city….. I’d really like it if you stayed.”

Arthur stared up at Alfred in shock. People didn’t usually ask for his company much less like it. He looked around the farm as he thought about the other points Alfred had made. It was true that did seemed like the ideal place to relax. It was quiet and peaceful and there was no one but Alfred. Arthur smiled at Alfred who looked hopefully at him. “I don’t think I’m pretty good company, but…..if you like having me around…. I guess I can stay.”

Alfred lit up and laughed, sweeping a stunned Arthur into a hug. “Awesome!”

When Alfred let go of Arthur, making sure to put him down carefully back into the seat, and he immediately started talking. “I’ll show you around the farm! You’ll love it. There’s Bess, one of the sweeter cows, and the chickens, and the horses…. Oh! And I can’t forget about Shadow- the cat….”

Arthur smiled patiently at Alfred as he kept babbling. The sun’s final rays shone on Alfred’s shining face. His excitement was contagious and Arthur couldn’t wait to see how the rest of his time here would go. 

Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad of a vacation after all.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Title: Pain
> 
> Author: twilight-rose1
> 
> Summary: Arthur had a surprisingly large pain tolerance. Which was a good thing, but not really helpful right now. Maybe this cheerful farmer could help him out.
> 
> Ship: UsUk
> 
> Warnings: None
> 
> Notes: Well, I was thinking about how much pain England would be able to stand and then this happened….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry it took so long. I had it finished and then I kind of... left it there.

Alfred had never been good at dealing with pain- but he had had to learn to tolerate it. When he was young even a tiny papercut would always turn him into a total crybaby, much to his brother’s dismay. This meant that even though he  _ wanted _ to be a hero, he shied away from fighting and was  _ really _ bad at dealing with bullies (they always made fun of his for being  _ chubby _ ). This was something that he later learned to get better at- both getting into fights and dealing with bullies- but not because he was defending other people, but because he had to defend himself or risk getting hurt… or killed sometimes. But when he was younger, this tendency of his was perfectly okay because he had his family and his family was always there for him and would never abandon him. He would always have his dad to talk to the mean boy's parents. His mom would always bake him a cake and treat his wounds and give him a soft kiss on every hurt. His brother would always rescue him from the bullies and go and fight the bullies every time  _ no matter what _ .

He would learn to abandon that naive way of thinking. 

He was also horrible at dealing with emotional pain. He hated getting in fights with his brother. He cried when his brother got mad and treated him to one of his long lectures about  _ everything _ that was bad with him. He  _ despised _ it when either of his parents got mad at him because he did something wrong and it was even worse when they looked at him with that  _ disappointed _ look. He always tried the best he could to please everyone so that they would never be mad at him. And this always worked and so he thought that if he  _ tried _ then things would always get better eventually. 

This would be his downfall when nothing he did would make things better.

He didn’t know when everything first changed exactly. It could be when his parents started having petty fights which later turned into huge ones. It could be when his father started drinking because even though there were fights before, life wasn’t that bad, the family still ate together, laughed together, had fun times (even though it there was something  _ wrong _ and he always realized too late that their parents had never said  _ one word _ to each other). But with the drinking came the even longer silences filled with unsaid disgust and they always ate alone and both his parents stopped laughing even if Alfred  _ tried so hard _ to make things better and even  _ bigger _ fights started where things got thrown and a fourteen year old Alfred was so scared by the screaming that he crept into his brother’s bed and they slept together as if they were ten again and Alfred had woken up from nightmares after watching a scary movie that his brother had  _ said _ would he shouldn’t watch because they would give him nightmares (but that was the  _ exact _ statement that made him want to watch it and his scheming brother  _ knew _ that).

But still, Alfred knew, that things  _ really _ fell apart when Matthew, his brother, his  _ best friend _ , stopped talking to him. He didn’t even know what caused it- it was just that one day a fifteen year old Alfred came home from school and Matthew, who had just came out of their mom’s room, looked at him with a closed off expression and walked passed him without a word. Matthew and Alfred had a close relationship- they always greeted one another when either of them came home, they always worked together, took care of each other, especially after everything started to go sour.  _ Always _ . Now whenever Alfred would try and talk to Matthew, he would ignore him and when he tried to touch him, he was brushed off, and when he woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of screaming, he would find Matthew’s door locked. His mother was always distracted and talking about everything  _ wrong _ with her marriage and her husband. His father was always drunk and a silent brooding wall that never talked anymore. And his brother had… disappeared. He was the same person, always nice and polite and sometimes a person other people found easy to forget about (though Alfred never did), but to  _ Alfred _ , his brother had disappeared. Gone was the person that he could count on- that he could go to and talk to and who was the person closest to him- and to the person who replaced Matthew, Alfred didn’t  _ exist _ . 

One day, the bullies were back and they were being particularly vicious and wouldn’t let him go even if he tried to walk away and then one of them started to hit him and others joined in and he saw Matthew come towards them. Alfred’s eyes had widened with he had tried to run towards him but the bullies had held him back. His brother would  _ always _ help him. But Matthew had stopped, made slow eye contact with Alfred and then turned and  _ walked away _ (he would later be rescued by a teacher, a pretty Ms. Natalie, who had seen what was happening and it was her who would treat his wounds and drive him back to his dark silent home).

But Alfred always kept trying.

He tried to talk to Matthew and find out what was wrong. He tried to get his mother to be happy again. He started to cook for his family when his mother stopped trying. He started to learn how to make the  _ perfect _ pancakes because if that wouldn’t make Matthew forgive him, nothing would. He began to take care of the farm after his father stopped doing anything but drinking, eating, sleeping. 

But it never  _ worked _ . 

Matthew would always give him the cold shoulder, his mother would never try and see that something was wrong and was obsessed with everything wrong with her, and his father…. He just got worse and worse and eventually there was nothing but empty bottles in the living room and his father passed out on the couch. The bullies wouldn’t go away.

Then one day, Alfred finally perfected his pancakes and he was so  _ happy _ . Everything would be okay and Matthew would finally forgive whatever mistake Alfred made. It was late night and he decided that he would make the pancakes as breakfast for Matthew. He went to sleep and had the first proper sleep in a long time. There wasn’t any screaming and he could finally fix everything. 

He woke up alone.

There was no one in the house except his inebriated father. His mother had taken Matthew and left. Alfred apparently didn’t matter. Nothing would get better. There wasn’t anything  _ left _ to get better. Alfred stayed home for two days and when he came back to school, he was treated to pitying whispers and hastily averted stares. In such a small community, everyone already knew what had happened. The one good thing that came out everything was that while Alfred was  _ trying _ , he hadn’t noticed that he had lost the last of his baby fat and was now totally fit which meant that the bullies had started to become scared of  _ him _ and now stayed far away. But the damage was done and the crybaby boy could now break his leg and bear it.

Alfred went through junior year in a haze, passing all his grades not because he studied, but because the teachers pitied him. He did the farm work automatically because the crops and animals didn’t need to suffer because of his mess of a life. 

He stopped trying. And he learned to deal with pain.

He snapped out of it when his father got ill from all the drinking and collapsed. This was during the vacation- which was during the growing season as the majority of the community had crops to deal with and thus the reason that Alfred was actually home during that time- and Alfred had rushed his father to the hospital. It turned out that the drinking had really damaged his body and it was unlikely that he would survive for much longer. That couldn’t happen. His  _ dad _ couldn’t die!

Alfred started trying again.

He had to pay the hospital bills and if that meant that he had to take some extra work along with taking care of the farm, then he would have to do what he had to do. It seemed that Alfred’s dad had also started to snap out of whatever brooding stage he had been in and started to talking to Alfred again and they started to know each other again. One day, while he was visiting the hospital after work, Alfred’s dad shifted and started a conversation that Alfred would remember forever. 

His dad was all skin and bones by this time and Alfred could see the life leaving him with each breath. He was hooked up with strange alien looking machines and the room was filled with steady beeping.

“Alfred….” Alfred looked up to see his dad- a shrunken version of his former self- raise a hand and he hurried to clasp it.

“What’s wrong dad?” Alfred pressed his cheek against his dad’s bony hand. 

His dad coughed and his whole body shook. Alfred tensed ready to call the nurses if it got too bad but his dad waved it off and settled. “I’m fine, I’m fine!”

Alfred was unconvinced but said nothing. He grasped his dad’s hand more firmly. 

His dad feebly tried to return the grip but it was nowhere as strong as it should have been. “Alfred…. I know I’ve put you through a lot- no let me finish!” Another round of coughing rattled through his body. “I know that you were the one who was affected the most by the fights, the silence, everything. I know how much it hurt you to be left alone.” Alfred opened his mouth to protest but was once again silenced by a glare. “You’ve…. You’ve always been such a  _ bright _ child and our family…. We snuffed out your light.”

His father paused for a bit to catch his breath. “I knew what was happening…. I  _ knew _ . I saw what everything was doing to you but I did nothing…. I was too weak to face all the problems that I had caused-”

“It wasn’t-!” Alfred rose in disagreement.

“Let me finish!” His dad’s voice rose sharply and doused out any fire within Alfred. Alfred sat back down onto the chair next to the bed. Seeing him deflate, Alfred’s dad lowered his voice again. “I turned to booze to solve my problems and that was the last of my many mistakes and I watched my life fall apart. And the worst part of it is, my mistakes didn’t only cause me pain, no, they hurt you too and that is unforgivable.” The man took a deep, shuddering breath. “I’ve gotten my punishment but I won’t leave you to suffer.” 

Now, his dad turned to him and Alfred could see the strong, boisterous spirit that had once inhabited the body. “What I tell you now Alfred, I want you to promise to do.”

“Of course, anything!” Alfred hurried to agree and he meant it. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for his dad. 

Alfred’s dad nodded in satisfaction, seeing the earnestness within Alfred’s eyes. “First, I want you to stop paying for my treatment- you said  _ anything _ Alfred and you  _ will _ carry this out.  _ This is my punishment _ and I will not have you ruin your life to try and bail me out.” He waited until he saw Alfred nod before continuing. “Second, whatever happened to our family was in no way your fault. If anything it was the fault of the rest of the family even Matthew, for all that he was a teenager and filled with the teenage angst and anger that every person that age has. We failed you not only because whatever the whole thing was about wasn’t your fault but also because you didn’t even know what happened…… and you, the pure soul that you are, just bore it and tried to make things better.”

Alfred blinked back tears when he remembered everything that had happened and tried to focus more on what his dad was saying. He would carry out his dad’s wishes as if they were his last words.

“Now….. Now I want to tell you the reason behind it.” His dad’s eyes glistened and Alfred realized that he understood the pain that the memories brought up for Alfred. “You know that there is a year difference between you and Matthew.” 

Alfred nodded. It had always irked him to be the younger brother.

“You were born on the same day as this country’s birthday just as Matthew was born on Canada’s independence day and that coincidence has always…..” His father’s voice trailed off. “But that doesn’t have anything to do with this. I’m really not good at telling things subtly.” 

Alfred chuckled. He knew this as he had inherited the trait. His father smiled at him and squeezed his hand. “Okay, I’ll try this again. You were born in D.C., you remember us telling you that?”

“Yeah.” Alfred nodded, a bit confused.

His dad winced, as if what he was saying hurt him. “You were born in D.C., but…. Your mother- she was back in the farm.”

Alfred started, piecing together everything slowly before he jumped up and started pacing. He couldn’t believe it- it  _ couldn't _ be true. “Y-You mean-”

He broke off, unable to say it out loud.

His father nodded sadly. “Yes, it was the result of a one time thing. Both of us were drunk and we didn’t know what we were doing but the damage was done. Of course, I told your mother immediately and she was angry… but she accepted it…. Or at least I thought she did. I started questioning that when the fighting started to become worse and it was clear that it wasn’t ‘forgetting to clean the dishes’ that she was talking about.”

Alfred stopped pacing and dropped onto the chair, unable to process properly what his dad was saying. Suddenly he fixed his gaze on his dad again, beseeching what he thought to not be true. “T-Then Matthew?”

Alfred’s dad nodded somberly. “I can only assume that your mother told him the truth that day, when he first started to ignore you.”

“And he- he just?! I  _ didn’t know anything!  _ I thought that I had done something  _ horrible _ and  _ that _ was why he was mad at me!” Alfred was shouting by the end and he had risen again, furiously pacing with a hand pulling at his hair. He could see people peering in curiously through the crack in the door as they walked by, but no one came in. “How  _ could _ he? He was my brother- my  _ older _ brother!”

Alfred turned to his dad to see him looking at him sadly. “I know. We’ve all failed you, Alfred. I-I can only apologize for myself and you  _ don’t _ have to forgive me-”

“ _ No _ .” Alfred strode to him and gave his dad a hugged. He could feel his dad tense before he finally gave in and hugged him. He thought about all that his father had done wrong and then he thought about how much courage he had to confess and the fact that he was going to to- Alfred couldn’t even think it. “You don’t need to feel bad about  _ their _ actions. As far as I’m concerned, you've more than made up for your mistakes.”

Alfred’s dad let out a shuddering breath. “T-thank you Alfred. I didn’t- I didn’t want you to live this life. And…. And that’s why I want you to promise me one last thing: to be happy, even after I’m gone.”

Alfred blinked back his tears because his dad was asking one last thing of him- and it  _ was _ the  _ last _ , the absolute  _ last thing _ \- and Alfred would do this for him even if he didn’t want to. He buried his face into the bony shoulder beneath him, hoping that his dad couldn’t feel his gown getting wet as his tears overflowed. “I promise.” 

They had spent the rest of his dad’s days together as happily as possible though beneath the happy facade, Alfred was cracking at the thought of losing his dad right after they had made up. After this, there would be no one left to help him. 

No one to love him.

His father died in his sleep to months after.

This time Alfred didn’t shut down. He had made a promise to his dad and he would keep it. He worked, he took care of the animals, he wasn’t as happy as he was before, but he was  _ content _ . And if sometimes he looked at the pancakes he made for breakfast and wondered if there would ever be anyone he could share them with, well, love didn’t fall out of the sky. When he was fortunate enough to have a chance at it again, he would hold it tight with open arms.

XOXOXOXOX

Now, the day after Arthur agreed to stay at the farm, as Alfred watched Arthur eat his pancakes, he was reminded of the pancakes he had made so long ago. The ones that he had eaten alone in the dark kitchen because nowhere else was there. Things had changed so much since that dark day. He had changed so much from that person he had been. He had learned from his mistakes and grown into someone else.

Laughing as Arthur caught him staring and scowled at him, Alfred realized that he might actually be happy. “What do you want to do today?”

Arthur shrugged, his eyebrows scrunching up as he thought, still chewing on his bite of pancake. Alfred was momentarily caught off guard by how charming he was with his pristine clothes, English accent, and bright emerald eyes combined with his no nonsense personality.…...Maybe Alfred was ready to see if he could have another chance at love too. “You decide.”

“Okay,” Alfred brightly returned, already bouncing in his seat as he thought of the possibilities. He hid his laughter at how Arthur shot him a scornful glance. Arthur seemed to be unable to wrap his head around the idea that people could like being up in the early morning.

“Stop bouncing. You’re making my head hurt.” Arthur got up abruptly, picking up his plates, half striding and half walking in the direction of the kitchen. Alfred hurried after him, grinning, as he tried to help his guest, even as Arthur tried to brush him off.

Things were looking great already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it for this story. Feel free to ask me questions about what happened before and after!


End file.
